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Episode Summary
You built the company, you carry the calendar, and somewhere along the way the veneer became the job. Things look fine on the outside. Inside, you’re running on fumes, faking certainty in front of your team, and trying not to flinch when an employee, a customer, or a headline pushes on something tender. I brought Sue Hawkes back because she has a word for the opposite of that posture, and she trademarked it. Unfuckwithable. A grounded, centered state where nothing anyone says or does shakes you, and no negativity or drama can touch you. We got into how Sue arrived there the hard way (parents and brother gone, divorce, two businesses collapsing in 2008, every possession in one pod), why ego is the thing keeping most owners stuck in impostor syndrome, and what it actually looks like to lead through a year where pandemic, racial reckoning, and an election are all colliding. The line that hit hardest: you can’t be a weeny in a pandemic. Your Module 7 — Leadership Team is reading you right now, and the bonds you form in the next six months will define the next decade.
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## Top 10 Takeaways- Unfuckwithable is not arrogance. It’s the grounded state where you can hear hard things without going defensive.
- Your veneer is the most expensive thing you own. It costs you the truth your team needs you to tell.
- Ego is what keeps you performing for an audience instead of leading from who you actually are.
- Confidence lets you argue. Groundedness lets you listen and be influenced without losing yourself.
- Sincere apology is one of the most generous leadership acts you’ll ever perform.
- Self-care is not a checklist. It’s the space you create so the next decision isn’t a reaction.
- You can take a break. You don’t get to quit. Pressure is the price of the seat.
- A pandemic strips the excuses. The B player you tolerated for years is now a luxury you can’t afford.
- Your core values aren’t real until they’ve been stress tested. This year is the test.
- Unlearning is more valuable than learning. The next chapter needs space, not more inputs.
Sound Bites
“Unfuckwithable means when you’re truly at peace and in touch with yourself where nothing anyone says or does bothers you and no negativity or drama can touch you.” (@00:01:04) — Sue Hawkes
“At 40 years of age I was dealing with six of the seven categories of grief at one time. And no one knew because my veneer, my armor, was the fake stuff, the pretense, the maintaining the image to the outside world that hey, things are good.” (@00:04:49) — Sue Hawkes
“The best time to create trust is in the absence of it.” (@00:32:44) — Sue Hawkes
“You can’t be a weeny in a pandemic. We don’t have the luxury to keep people who don’t align.” (@00:46:04) — Sue Hawkes
“Sometimes you need to take a break and just say, I’m at a max. Rest, don’t quit. Pressure is the price you pay to sit at that table.” (@00:37:52) — Sue Hawkes
About This Episode
Sue Hawkes is the CEO of YESS!, a Certified EOS Implementer, an award-winning author of Chasing Perfection, and host of the Intentional Greatness podcast. She has spent decades coaching CEOs and leadership teams through the work most owners avoid: the internal stuff. This is her return appearance on the show, recorded mid-2020 against the backdrop of pandemic, racial reckoning, and an election year. She brings a word she trademarked, Unfuckwithable, and a story of how she earned it the hard way.
Resources Mentioned
- Chasing Perfection by Sue Hawkes — Sue’s book on the continuum from impostor syndrome to unfuckwithable.
- YESS! / Sue Hawkes — yesscoach.com
- Intentional Greatness Podcast — Sue’s show.
- EOS (Entrepreneurial Operating System) — Referenced via Gino Wickman and the Clarity Break practice.
- Brené Brown — Referenced for vulnerability and the arena.
Connections
Phase + Module:
- Module 7 — Leadership Team — Grounded leadership as the foundation the team reads off of every day
- Module 3 — Owner’s Playbook — Core values as the filter that holds when the year gets hard
Milestones:
- Milestone 21 — Leadership Development — Self-leadership as the prerequisite to developing anyone else
Concepts referenced:
- The Owner-Operator Trap™ — The veneer the owner-operator wears when they can’t admit the seat is too heavy
- Noble Aim — The why that holds when material possessions and busyness get stripped away
- The One Thing — Creating space by removing inputs, not adding more